Boy Talk
by Damon'sSmirk
Summary: It's a fanfiction I wrote while stalking three roleplayers on Tumblr. Effy Petrova and Roxanne Salvatore.


Roxie was feeling quite bored and stupid as she sat in the huge mansion house, wandering from the bed rooms to the living rooms to the dining room—that's how bored she was. And even though she doesn't like to admit it out loud, she was really missing her brothers. Stefan was being a dick; he was probably out with Klaus right now kissing each others' drunken asses. Damon was being secretive about some girl who he likes.

The Salvatore's have an amazing sex life.

Roxie? What about _her _sex life? Well, frankly, it sucked.

Roxie was in love with a vampire who didn't believe in love, he believed in sex. And he was pretty good in it too. But what about Roxie's feelings? Sometimes she feels like she's the only girl in the world—like everything was great and amazing and that she had nothing to worry about.

He made her feel good.

However, in other times, he made her feel like utter and complete shit.

She was tempted to text Effy over, but she really wasn't sure. Effy mentioned being out with her friend today, _Is it let's ignore Roxie day or something?_

Pros of being The Salvatore's young sister:

1) She gets to live in this terribly huge house

Cons:

1) They always go out and leave her alone in that house.

2) Everyone hates her because of her brother.

3) Therefore, she has no one to invite over in that house.

Ironically, just before she even had time to depress over these facts, she heard two girls laughing loudly as they entered the house.

Instinctively, Roxie ran to the nearest spot to the door (vampire speed), secretly hoping that it would be a nice visit from a certain bat-swinging original.

"Ko—" but she stopped herself as soon as she saw who the not-so-much strangers were. "Oh, it's you." She smiled at the curly brunette and then glanced at the blonde next to her. "And towel girl."

"_Lexi." _The blonde corrected her and cocked an eyebrow. "Hi, friend."

Effy just laughed and walked past Roxie, looking around for any sign of her brothers. Lexi did the same. "Why do I have a feeling that you're not here for me?" Roxie said sarcastically before she let gravity take over her and fell on the nearest couch.

"Well..." Effy stalled, trying to think of an excuse.

"I'm here for Stefan." Lexi interrupted her and smiled. "Effy's here for Damon."

Roxie's jaw was only a few inches away from the floor. "Oh. My. God."

So, the possibilities of taking Roxie and Lexi out was high. Plus, she was older than them. Therefore, stronger. She could snap their necks in a blink and get away with it. But, best friends don't snap each others' necks... do they?

"I can't believe you told her that." She mumbled, only audible for Lexi.

"I can't believe you're my brother's secret girlfriend!" Roxie yelled.

Effy sighed and rubbed her forehead. "Oh, for fuck's sake, Rox."

Roxie ignore her. "I can't believe you didn't tell me!"

"Seems like you can't believe a lot of things today, Rox." Effy mocked her and tilted her head. Annoyed. She was so annoyed that she was seriously considering snapping every bone in her body. What was such a surprise? Yeah, she's dating Damon. She thought that it was obvious anyway... Because for one, he didn't glare at her every time she breathed anymore. That counts for something, right? "Plus, I don't recall you telling me that you're sleeping with Kol."

That caught Lexi's attention. She came running, vampire speed, almost knocking everything down on her way as she stared with a disgusted, shocked and confused expression. "You're sleeping with Kol?"

"Wow, rich." Roxie said sarcastically as she glared at Effy.

Effy shrugged. "You're not in a place to judge either, Lex. You're sleeping with Stefan." She smirked. "Friends with benefits, eh?"

She rolled her eyes. "Shut up."

"Wow, you're _both _sleeping with my _brothers_." Roxie couldn't believe it. A part of her was hurt because, well, because she thought she was close to Effy. She thought that she would probably tell her that she was fucking her brother, it was that easy. She was _her _bestfriend. Damon was _her _brother.

"Well, I think we should just sit here and talk." Lex suggested with an awkward smile. "Till the boys are here, anyway."

"Yeah, you two have a lot of explaining to do."

One word would sum up everything that happened the past hour as they sat in the living room. Effy lying on the couch with the remote control in her hand, complaining about American TV shows and how she misses British TV shows and how she just wanted to go back to London and ignore everyone in Mystic Falls. Roxie made a snarky comment about her and Damon, Lexi laughed, Effy glared at both of them and made a witty comment about both of their relationships.

Rinse, repeat.

If Damon was here, he would've loved to see a cat fight between these three. But he wasn't. Neither were Stefan and Kol. So whether they liked it or not, they were stuck together for a while.

"So, Kol, huh?" It was Lexi who broke the silence. And even though it was the stupidest question to ask right now, it still did a great job to ease the awkward silence that was glaring at them. Roxie nodded, a smile creeping on her face.

Effy smirked. "You should hear their ship name, it's hilarious!"

Lexi looked confused again. "Ship name?" she said, sounding like someone who just heard an Alien talk.

Roxie rolled her eyes and explained. "It's that thing where you mash a couple's name together." She said.

Effy acted oblivious of their quiet talk and just laughed. "It's Koxie." She laughed eve more, smirking at the glares that Roxie shot her.

Lexi laughed too. "Their ship name is _Koxie?"_

Effy nodded. "It sounds like '_Cock, see?_' really quick."

Roxie made a 'hmph' sound and rolled her eyes, obviously annoyed and feeling left out. She admitted to herself that it wasn't the cutest ship name known to history, but it wasn't the worst one either. Right? She shrugged her thoughts off and just glared at both of the girls.

"Excuse me, but _Deffy _doesn't sound that romantic either." She said.

Lexi wasn't amused with Effy and Roxie's fight Instead of actually joining them, she just smiled and daydreamed. "I wonder what my ship name is..." She said to herself.

"Easy, Stefan + Lexi =..." Roxie smiled dorkily.

"SEXI!" Lexi yelled, like she just saw the best thing ever known to human history with a goofy smile on her face. "That's so awesome."

"Your ship names indicate that you're both the horniest couples ever." Effy said.

Roxie rolled her eyes. "At least we're not _deaf."_

Lexi just seemed confused again. "Huh?"

"_Deffy. _That's their ship name." Roxie explained again.

"Oh." Lexi laughed. "I don't know, Deffy sounds like a farm animal. _Come here Deffy Deffy, Here Deffy boy, I'm going to feed my Deffy now."_

They erupted in laughter, then took a look at the very annoyed Effy and laughed again. "Both of you cut it out, now." Effy threatened, secretly looking for her phone so she could text Damon and tell him that if he's another minute late, he'll come home to a dead sister.

"_Maybe we should go on a triple date!"_ Lexi suggested, making Effy doubt her friend's sanity.

"How do you come up with those ideas?" She said.

Roxie seemed to disagree with Effy. "Great idea!"

"Am I the only one who thinks Kol + Damon + Stefan + The same room = Terrible idea?" Effy complained loudly, glaring at both of them.

"_Yes." _Roxie and Lexi both said in the same time.


End file.
